To be, or to be, That is a question

I am learning Spanish.

In English, there is only one word for expressing “to be”. “I am happy”, “you are tall”, “my neighbours are nice” - all using the same word - be.

In Spanish, one particularly tricky thing for a learner, is that there are two words that both mean “to be” - “ser” and “estar”. So, to say “I am tall”, I would need to use “ser” - Yo soy alta; but to say “I am sad”, I would need to use “estar” - Yo estoy triste.

We are not here for a language class and I’m certainly not qualified to give one. According to grammar books, the differences are:

• “Ser” is used for characteristics such as identity, occupation, nationality, etc.
• “Estar” is used for conditions such as temporary states, emotions, locations, actions, etc.

After getting through the initial struggle, I come to love the culture behind this language system.

Take “I am” for example. Throughout life, we assume many roles, go through many states of mind, and experience a revolving door of emotions. We use sentences starting with “I am” all the time. Yet, it does not happen a lot that we actually take a beat and consider: when I say “I am ___”, am I only describing a temporary state, or am I in fact identifying as that thing? If I say “I am sad”, is this to express a passing feeling after getting some bad news; or am I declaring that I am slumping towards depression?

Philosophically, “I am” is a massive subject examining selfhood, existence, and consciousness of the individual. Even without digging quite so deeply, it makes sense that we should not take “I am” statements so lightly. To say “I am angry” implies identifying as an angry person. To say “that matter upsets me”, however, simply expresses my feeling and reaction towards a certain matter. It does not change who I am.

One should never underestimate the power of language. What comes out of our mouths does not just exchange information at the exact point of speaking; it nearly always carries extended influences and consequences. How often do we use “you are” in front of a harsh descriptive word, and as a result, brand another person unjustifiably? And let’s admit it—we tend do that even more to the people who are closest to us, the ones we genuinely care for the most.

Going back to Spanish. I recently learned that, while “estoy feliz” is the standard way of saying “I am happy right now,” it is also entirely correct to say “soy feliz” if what I want to express is that I am, fundamentally, a happy person.

I absolutely love that there is a linguistic framework that allows us to permanently identify as a happy person. I would like to live at that place.